Photography + Motherhood | Virtual Assistant for Photographers
Balancing photography + motherhood is something that’s hard to prepare for. I remember when I decided it was time to start our family, and my photography business was in its early days. I was worried about how I was going to juggle all the things. The problem was, I didn’t even know what “all the things” were yet.
How do you know what it will feel like to be sleep deprived for days on end, or how about throwing your routine out the window because your kid is home sick from school? As much as I could orient my values + priorities before becoming a parent… there was so much I just had to live.
I am currently about 5 years into parenting, and I have been on a lEaRnInG cUrVe. My virtual assistant agency took off right when I was getting my feet under me, and it’s been a crash course in time management, priorities, flexibility and stamina. Like anything worth doing, it takes time and effort to practice good balance between photography + motherhood. But I feel like I’m finally starting to learn a few things.
If I could step back in time, and grab a cup of coffee with my previous self, there are a few things I would tell her.
You will get used to a level of busyness you have never experienced before. You grow stamina for it, and while you’re tired - it doesn’t flatten you anymore.
You have to trust yourself. You will consistently have to decide between flexibility and boundaries. And the steadiness of life will come from within. Honestly it’s a great skill to develop.
You don’t have to get rid of mom guilt. She’s there. She’s culturally engrained. She loves to rear her ugly head. Have a few friends you can text when you can’t shake the guilt who can remind you of the truth (you’re a kick ass parent and business owner). But don’t waste stress on trying to eliminate her. Try to take the “oh brother” approach when you feel like you’re failing.
You can’t do everything all at once anymore. You can do whatever you want. But things will be metered out in a slower process than before. It’s okay to break things up and not power thru.
It’s okay if it takes time to learn how to care for yourself again. Managing a thriving business and also showing up for your kids, is a tall demand. If you need to let go a little to find your footing, I promise everything will balance out again. You’ll find ways to hold space for yourself, do things you like, and take care of your soul again. Have patience & compassion if you feel like you’re failing at this too.
Your kids are going to bring a kaleidoscope of joy to your life that you’ve never experienced. While yes, there are sacrifices to parenting, the unbelievable daily joy is unmatched. It’s worth every second.
Your business is going to thrive with the added motivation. The stakes are much, much higher when someone’s childhood depends on you. That motivation will spur you into action like never before. Creative ideas, dedicated passion, and good old fashioned hard work will come easily because you’re doing it for them now too.
There are times your business has to take the backseat for your kids, and that’s okay. Sometimes your kids needs just mean hitting pause on your client’s needs. And that’s okay. At the end of the day, we aren’t doing anything life or death, and everyone will be okay.
If you’re also a parent who is starting the process of balancing photography + motherhood, just know you’re not alone.
Your path through it probably won’t be like mine, and that’s the magic sauce of parenting. It’s different for us all, because we are all different.
I know when I first started this process, I was eager to learn anything and everything I could about running a business and being a parent. I devoured instagram posts and parenting books. I looked up to any photographer I could find who was talking about this stuff.
So I hope now, 5 years later, I can reach back and offer a few thoughts to anyone starting on this journey.
Best damn years of my life.